Note1: It’s got sharks. And it’s got a tornado. Get it? It’s a tornado of sharks. What’s not to like? Just make sure you keep your mouth shut throughout the movie. Else you may end up swallowing a hammerhead.
Note2: Hand on heart, I must’ve been in a rather funny-peculiar mood when I first suggested “Sharknado” to my boyfriend. The said mood wore off after about five minutes, and I spent the remaining eighty-one minutes gagging mulishly on. Consider yourself warned.
Note1: What boyfriend.
Note2: The main character’s called Fin. Must I continue.
Note 3: I can’t believe Olga watched this stone cold sober. What’s wrong with her. As a fictional character, I don’t get much choice in the matter, but here’s my advice for any non-fictional human: before you sit down to watch this sorryass piece of cinematic entertainment, do yourself a favour and get well and truly shoshed. Or stoned. Or, preferably, both.
Public Safety Addendum (not my idea): Please do not get sloshed or stoned if you’re on the wagon. Obvs. So if you are, like, in recovery and stuff, the best thing to do is to view “Sharknado” as a high-risk relapse-trigger and therefore not to view it at all.